We will primarily draw upon three sources for our writing, insight, inspiration and discussion: The Bible, The Life and Teachings of Jesus, a Restatement of the Gospels by Preston Thomas, and The Urantia Book.
This blog is a joint project between Angel John and her spiritual grandfather Larry Watkins, who lives in Colorado and who happily assists her in her outreach work.We welcome your comments, questions, suggestions. Angel John can be reached at email@example.com. Please click here to visit her facebook account.
Mrs. Laly Jose
Mrs. Laly Jose has helped me to know more about Jesus; she is my neighbor and is my inspiration. She is a Minister of Save India Prayer Fellowship. She’s married to Mr. Jose and has two children; I was her son’s classmate. She is a powerful teacher and their family is dedicated to Jesus. She is like a mother for me.
Mr. Larry Watkins… My Grand Father… a gift from Father in Heaven. I missed lots of love in my life… so Jesus gave a wonderful Grandpa for me. I was 24 yrs old when we met but when I talked to Grandpa I felt like just a 5 year old girl. Grandpa is my teacher, father, Grand Father, friend, etc. He has helped me to improve my English and we help one another to grow more spiritually. Everyday we just meet on Skype for prayer and discussion about the Gospel and other things that are meaningful and important to us, to know more about Jesus. The best gift in my life is Jesus… and one of the best blessing from Jesus is my Grand Father.
I would like to say a little about myself. I am Angel, born in 1986, a girl from a Hindu family in Kerala, India. My father is a mason, mother is a housewife and my younger brother and sister are engineers. I studied history in college and am working in a travel agency today (2012). My parents are from very orthodox Hindu families in the Indian state of Tamil Nadu.
When my father started mason work he came to Kerala. After his marriage he brought my mother with him and they settled here, first in a rented house. The owner of the house was an old woman, a CSI Christian. She loved me more than my brother and sister and took me to church with her so until I was 10 years old I was a church member. I went to the church with her and then in the evening I prayed with my parents to Hindu deities. After 10 years she moved to another place with her daughter and I stopped going to church. From age 10 to 15 I didn’t visit a church or a temple but I did pray to all saints, deities, stone gods, Jesus, mother Mary, etc. Then from 15 to 19 years of age I continuously visited temples near to my school and college.
I had a lot of problems in my home. My father was a drunken person… no peace or happiness… I did lots of poojas (Hindu rituals) and give money to bring peace to my home but nothing ever worked.
During my last year at college I met Jesus. One of our neighbors invited me to her prayer meetings but I didn’t go there… my brother, mother, and sister went and participated in prayer meetings and my mother received Jesus first. I asked her why? Jesus? No use? But later I too started to participate in the prayer meetings… slowly… and I loved it. Our neighbor gave me a Bible and I read Psalm 23 every night before I went to bed. Still, there was no peace in my family.
All of the difficult family problems had made me a very touchy Angel. Anger, jealousy of my brother and sister because their skin color is lighter than mine and my parents showed more love to them… these made me a very angry girl who always was thinking negative things with sudden anger. When I finally opened the door of my heart to Jesus I began to feel a small change in my mind… something new… a new feeling.
Slowly I began to pray to Jesus… first, before I went to bed. Then I fixed a time, 7pm every evening, then I thought I wanted to pray in the morning too, 7am with a long list of prayer needs. I couldn’t pray in front of my father so I hid myself under a blanket on my bed. If he saw me I acted like I was asleep. Once he told me, “I am Hindu… so you are also a Hindu. When I pray to my Siva you pray to Jesus… it’s not allowed in this home. If I see this again I will burn your Bible.” I prayed about this and after a year again pappa called me and said “don’t act like you’re sleeping any more… you just pray to Jesus… whatever you wish.” Such a good Jesus… my first blessing… everything is a blessing in my life… but this is the biggest thing that happened to me at that time.
I know this is a little long… but I want to tell you how much difference I feel before and after my Jesus. After 2 more years my love for Jesus increased and I wanted to know more about him… that search gave me The Urantia Book and a loving grandpa too.
First… Jesus gave a peace to my mind. I think that’s the biggest thing we need in our life, peace. Before this every night was a nightmare for us… a father who always shouted at his children. A father who was always strict… a father who didn’t have time to spend with his family… all of these made me hate my pappa. But when Jesus came to my mind… when I received his love in my mind… I understood what Jesus was teaching me… Love everyone… don’t hate anybody, forgive them. I knew these things but it took more time to experience them in my mind before I started to change. I learned how to control anger, how to forgive my brother and sister, how to be quiet when I heard something that compelled me to explode… all of these changes because of Jesus’ love. I forgave my father. After another year pappa reduced his drunken habit and started to talk with us… spend time with us… laugh with us. But by then I was 24 years old and had missed all of my childhood love and care… I always felt sad about that until Jesus gave a grandpa to me.
I think the spiritual life and our physical life are two sides of the same coin. For me, my spiritual life has given me a good physical life. I got respect, love and care from others… that is because of my spiritual life. My family trusts me because they know that I won’t do anything wrong because I am Jesus’ daughter. It’s a biggest blessing.
Here in my part of India women don’t get very much freedom but still there are a lot of ways to go wrong. Wrong relationships, internet and mobile phone uses, television and other medias… all of these have good and bad sides. Here arranged marriages are expected in the society… no boy friend-girl friend relationships are permitted. But a lot of people still have these relationships… some of them elope, some of them fight with their parents for this. For me Jesus has taught me to respect my parents, not to hurt them and I am doing that. I don’t want to fight with them for anything… I obey them but at the same time I pray to Jesus for the Father’s will to be done in my life. I know the Father’s choice is always best for his children… Jesus gives me whatever I need in my life… that is because I am ready to do the Father’s will.
I think the first step for making this spiritual change is to read the Bible New Testament or The Urantia Book [Part IV]. First I wanted to know what Jesus taught for a better life in this world. These two books gave me a foundation for a personal relationship with the Heavenly Father and also a better life in this world. I think they help to make my soul more perfect. Maybe it’s not perfect here but I want to be as perfect as possible. Reading the New Testament gave me an idea about who Jesus is and why he came to this world, also what he offers me and if I want to be his daughter, what I want to do.
I got answers to these thoughts through reading the Bible, discussion and asking questions with my neighbor minister and other people in the prayer group. Now I have some knowledge about the Heavenly Kingdom and I have Jesus in my mind.
Respect for my parents… it gave me a big turning point in my life. Before I met Jesus I respected them but from fear… if I didn’t obey them, maybe pappa would slap me or punish me. But after I met Jesus I respected my parents wishes for me… that comes from love… it has resulted in a wonderful daughter status in my family. Still I have problems about my potential marriage, my future, my religion, my culture etc., but I don’t want to worry about it. I know that the Heavenly Father will give what is best for me. This hope is very important in my life.
In the beginning it was very difficult for me to control my anger… I was easily hurt and angered… but if I was angry with my mother then I couldn’t pray. I felt something like a kind of heart pain. I would stop my prayer and tell my amma I was sorry. Sometimes, when I felt angry I got a thought… this is not okay for you because you are Jesus’ daughter. The presence of the Holy Spirit helps me to select only good and warns me to don’t do wrong.
Prayer helped me to realize all of these truths personally. It gave me a feeling that, whatever I have missed in my life the Father can give back. The realization that “the Father loves me more than anybody in this world” completely changed me. I want this love. If I want to keep this love in my mind I want to throw away the worldly things in my mind. Sometimes humanly a thing looks good for me but spiritually it is not… so I choose what is good for my spiritual life. Those will give the best result in my physical life.
After prayer I read the Bible… and then I think about how it talks to me. The Bible or the Urantia Book tell us a 2000 years ago story about Jesus. But this is not just a history, it’s our present, it’s for our present life. The gift is for us to make our life a better one. Whatever happened in the past is past… we can’t change it. We don’t know what will happen in the future… all we can do anything about is in this present moment.
So, I am a village girl who comes from a traditional Hindu background and I love and respect Indian traditions. But I also have found Jesus, so I am not altogether traditional. While I like traditional clothes, sari, lengthy churidar, scarves, I also like jeans and tee shirts and cosmetics sometimes. I love my rings, gold chains and bangles, silver anklets that go ching, ching, ching when I walk. I ride a motor bike; I am good with a computer and the internet and I like Hollywood and Bollywood movies. I enjoy foods of all kinds — I don’t restrict what I eat for religious reasons because I believe God has provided these good things for our appreciation and enjoyment; rather than restricting diet to show my adoration of the Father I give him the best gift humanly possible… my love and the desire to do His will.
Jesus taught me to express my love to my parents, brother and sister and others too. The results of this have been very beautiful for me. I want to be a good girl for my Jesus. This desire helps me to choose good things in my life, helps me to not hurt others, blesses me to share this light with others. The Holy Spirit always helps me to be alert with my mind and guides me toward good decisions.
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